Think of the lizard. It spends most of its life on the ground, envying the birds and indignant at its fate and its shape. “I am the most disliked of all the creatures,” it thinks. “Ugly, repulsive, and condemned to crawl along the ground.”One day, though, Mother Nature asks the lizard to make a cocoon. The lizard is startled -it has never made a cocoon before. It thinks that it is building his tomb, and prepares to die. Although unhappy with life it has led up until then, it complains to God: “Just when I finally became accustomed to things, Lord, you take away what little I have.”In desperation, it locks himself into the cocoon and awaits the end. Some days later, it finds that it has been transformed into a beautiful Butterfly. It is able to fly to the sky, and it is greatly admired.
in Maktub by Paulo Coelho
Change is not easy it’s difficult especially when we have spent a lifetime climbing the ladder of success only to discover after years of struggling that the ladder may have been leaning against the wrong wall. Understanding change can help us to realize the process and keep us from making decisions that are based on impulse and emotions. There are steps in the change process that we must consider if we are going to transform ourselves and become the best that we can be personally and professionally.
The Change Process
Change Is A Step Of Faith – Change can be so incremental that at times we don’t even notice the small successes that occur during the process. Think of going on a diet, you may not see the weight loss right away and can get frustrated when you only see small improvements. But, if you stay the course and have the faith that the right eating will improve your health and avoid weight related issues, one pound of weight loss per week will transfer into 52 pounds of weight loss at the end of a year. The same is true of personal growth. When we rise early, speak the truth, control our anger, and treat others with kindness and respect our actions will then speak louder than words. The success we experience because of our actions will result in greater confidence and we will then be motivated to truly have a heartfelt attitude that will result in a change from the inside out. Professionally when we take the time to understand others and slowly work with them to help change their behavior our confidence will grow and we will realize the benefits of our actions. Research has shown that it takes 6-7 attempts for a person to permanently change their behavior. Be persistent and stay the course. Your confidence will grow and so will the confidence of those that you love and care about.
Change Is Painful – Often physical change can be easier than a change in our mind or emotions. Becoming more mindful can help us change physically for sure, and in reality that may be the easy part. The painful part is changing our attitudes about our circumstances, and environmental upbringing. Adopting a more positive outlook, learning to stop worrying, being more accepting of others and forgiving of life and others can be a challenge, but well worth the effort. Try to understand that you can forget the past, but at times the past won’t forget you.
Change Requires Patience and We Will Revisit Old Behaviors From Time to Time – Mistakes are made; if we have made a commitment to change our behavior or habits realize that patience with ourselves is the key. Don’t throw in the sponge if you lost your temper or ate one too many slices of pizza. Get back on track and re-commit yourself to the process and get back in the game as quick as you can. You may have failed this time, but that doesn’t make you a failure.
We Must Be Willing – Some people quit smoking every New Year’s Day only to start again when stressful situations arise. The problem is not with their attitude but with their willingness to change. When we can will ourselves to do something nothing will get in the way. We just have to want something bad enough to make the change.
It Requires Positive Thinking and Positive People – The first responsibility that we and we alone have is for our thoughts. As we think we begin to say things and act on those thoughts. Positive energy requires positive thinking. Work to fill your mind with as many positive thoughts as you can. Read inspiring books, meditate, exercise, take a yoga class, or pray. Maintain friendships with people with the same thought process and eliminate those that are negative or trying to discourage you from following your road map to success.
It Is The Prerequisite For Greatness – Because our desire is to change physically, mentally, emotionally, or spiritually is so important we will place them in high priority. With every great break through there will be a break with. The process will lead us down a path a path where we will realize that because we have made changes we can insert these changes in many areas of our life that benefit ourselves and others. We will become more confident and courageous and won’t fret over small things because the changes we have made have in their own way provided us with the answers to some of life’s most basic questions.
It Requires Consistency and Flexibility – If our goal is to become more punctual at work and in our personal life being consistent will help with maintaining that habit. However, others may be less concerned with being on time than you are. Be as flexible as you can be with others without compromising your values. If you are waiting for someone to show up at the coffee shop let them know that they have 15 minutes grace before you leave. Flexibility and consistency helps us establish boundaries for ourselves and for others.
It Allows Us To Evaluate Our Motives – Why do we want to change? Is it for our own self improvement, or do we want to do what someone else wants us to do? If a person is trying to meet the expectations of another person while going against their own moral compass their motives need to be reevaluated. If a person’s behavior is having a negative impact or influence on a group or a family the behavior should change for the betterment of all of the group members.
It Strengthens Our Character – The old adage that character is what we do when no one is looking has a lot of merit here. To put on a show to make people believe that you are someone that you are not is high school stuff and should be avoided. When a person is alone and can resist partaking in a negative behavior that they have been working on is true success and true character. Way down deep in the chambers of a person’s soul sits the real truth and every person has to determine if their public life and private life line up as one indivisible whole.
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