by James Burns | Dec 26, 2018 | Burns' Bench
This Is The Final Installment On Responsibility Taken From Anti Bullying 101
Do you ever watch Crime Seen Investigation? (CSI) I do, occasionally. I am amazed how all the evidence that is collected can point directly at the suspect in question, but they just can’t seem to figure out a motive. They need the motive to convict the person of the crime. We all know what the motive of a bully is right? Power, they want to have power and control over a smaller or weaker person.
How do you change the motive of a bully?
By being the strongest and most influential person in the classroom. That’s right you the teacher have this ability. You don’t need to use power; you need to use your influence. When your students realize that you are in charge their motives change from wanting to hurt, to wanting to help. They have met their match. Remember it is not about the influence of your power, but rather the power of your influence.
Bench Notice
The motive of a person is buried somewhere deep within in their secret life. It’s never revealed until a therapist or someone in the legal field starts to dig for answers as to the reason why some act or crime was committed. Bullies are driven by power as I stated above, victims by revenge.
In knowing this, it should be the job of school personnel, parents, and the community to be aware of those that are being victimized and to do their best to work with them to overcome the trauma of bullying. School shootings are usually carried out with revenge in mind. Let’s do our best to Strengthen the victims, and to hold bullies accountable for their actions.
by James Burns | Dec 17, 2018 | Burns' Bench
Despite widespread institutional efforts, including initiatives on both the federal and local levels, bullying continues to plague schools and even adult environments all over the country. The unfortunate reality is that most bullies aren’t mature enough to empathize with their targets and thus often subject them to traumatic and potentially life-altering harassment. While bullies may be able to walk away and later disregard their past behavior as just them being kids many victims often develop a lifetime of emotional baggage that follows them into their adulthood, including mental illness, low self-esteem and even problems with drugs and alcohol.
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Bench Notice
Although this article may be trying to enlist the services of Behavioral Health of Palm Beach to help with the problem of addiction and bullying, it makes some great points that should be considered as a resource Often adults don’t recognize that the PTSD that they are suffering from is an indication of the past imprint related to bullying. As adults they may be addicted or have job related issues or even relationship or marital problems. As adults they are still working to try and discover themselves and where their moral compass is pointing.
As a school or even as a parent we need to recognize the clinical problems associated with bullying at an early age and the long term effects it can have on a person’s future behavior. Depression, anxiety, and social problems are all signs that their is something kicking around in a person’s thought process that is causing them to draw conclusions (both true and false) about who they are as individuals and how they view themselves in the world in which they live.
Schools need to make the connection between the clinical issues that a student is suffering from, anxiety etc, and the addiction problems that occurs as a result. Treating the addiction as schools do will help, but attacking the root problem is they key. If bullying is occurring in the school a futuristic approach needs to be taken in order to gain a view of the problems that lie ahead for the student. An approach needs to be taken that combines strengthening the victims of bullying, and making a determination if the behavior is conduct related (learned behavior) or clinically related (trauma influenced).
by James Burns | Dec 7, 2018 | Burns' Bench
A fan from a rival high school basketball team flopped around on the floor during a game Friday to mock a player’s epilepsy, witnesses claim.
James Franklin Jr., a senior at Indianapolis’ Cathedral High School, had part of his brain removed in August 2017 to reduce his number of epileptic seizures. He’s battled epilepsy since childhood, Indy Star reported. In spite of everything, he still pursues his love of basketball.
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Some people still haven’t grown up and probably never will. Publicly making fun of someone with a handicapping condition is something that should never be tolerated and I guess officials at the Center Grove are pretty embarrassed. I am not happy with their response and believe that their embarrassment will probably cause them to soft pedal this thing and it will end with a good talking to. Basically let’s kick it under the rug.
Center Grove staff said they never heard any of the seizure comments during the game, but that they were still investigating the claims.“We take all allegations seriously and are continuing to investigate who may have made those comments,” Center Grove officials wrote in the letter to parents.
Bench Notice
First of all it wasn’t the seizure comments,(Have another seizure) it was the student acting out like he was having a seizure. It was obvious and it was caught on tape. After watching the video, what is there to investigate. Sometimes people need to be guilty until proven innocent. In this case, “Due Process” may be taken a bit too far.
We need to spend more time valuing the differences in people and stop the abuse, and in this case valuing this students courage and desire to play the sport that he loves regardless of his condition. Franklin’s coach Jason Delaney called him “a warrior”
“No one sets a better example or fights harder than James Franklin,” Delaney said.
Well spoken Coach, I agree.
by James Burns | Dec 6, 2018 | Teen Suicide
MEMPHIS, Tenn. — An online petition demands that bullying at Houston High School stop after a young man took his own life this week. Social media posts suggest the drama student was bullied a lot. But the exact reasons are unclear.
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The reasons are unclear! Please. Bullied a lot and they’re looking for a reason. There are no reasons for treating someone disrespectfully, or in an unkind manner. The school may have turned a blind eye or they just don’t know how to deal with this type of abuse that produces this type of trauma in our young people today. We always seem to look for reasons why people act the way they do. Poor up bringing, abusive parents, alcoholism, addiction,or poor genetics to name a few. These all may have a large influence on a person’s life and could certainly lead them down the path of least resistance and potential mediocrity, but they must remain reasons and not turn into an excuses. These two words get interchanged readily in our society. When we hunt for a reason we may be trying to excuse away the behavior. Once the behavior is excused away the consequence is as well. Bullying is wrong and it must never be tolerated. There is no reason or excuse that can explain away the loss of a life. More time needs to be spent Strengthening The Victims Of Bullying so this horror stops giving parents nightmares. Bullies need to be held accountable with consequences that make a difference, not a slap on the wrist, and victims need to be strengthened so they can begin one again to have confidence, feel capable, and believe that they can contribute to the school they are attending.
by James Burns | Dec 5, 2018 | Uncategorized
The hardest thing to come to terms with, watching the video of a Syrian boy being bullied in a Huddersfield school that circulated last week, was the sense of inevitability to it. The degradation of the country’s political culture continues to play out: it has been poisoned by Brexit, jaundiced by Islamophobia, while anti-immigrant sentiment has been normalized by the Conservative government. We’ve been heading here for years, decades even – to a place where a refugee can flee a civil war to Britain’s safe shores, only to face another type of barbarism, and become a refugee again.
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I have spoken about this problem for years. As a society we have been brainwashed by the news outlets that do nothing more then spout off about their own philosophy and right or left wing beliefs. It has now become an inter-generational problem as evidenced by this article. Here is what I wrote almost 10 years ago about this topic in Anti Bullying 101.
FOX – CNN – MSNBC
Yes, I know all cable outlets for the news. Is it news, or is it the networks slant on the news? I think you know the answer. It is no longer just reporting the news. It’s reporting the new based upon the political views of the network. In homes across the country opinions are being formed by adults who listen to the thoughts of so called reporters, and experts who want everyone to believe that their network is fair and balanced. Thoughts about different countries, races, religions, ethnicity, and all manner of current events can enter homes with the click of a remote.
Do families talk about the news? Of course they do. The problem is they are not forming an opinion based upon their own values rather the values of others. How does this relate to bullying? The bias that may result in homes regarding the differences in others impacts our students. This negative communication filters down by osmosis and our students form negative attitudes and can become prejudicial in their thinking. What parents fail to understand is that their children attend school everyday with other students of very different backgrounds. Adults need to understand how their thoughts, words, actions, attitudes, and motives affect their children. It is far easier to build a boy than to mend a man. Know who is in front of you. Prejudice is learned it’s not genetic. Let’s all learn to value the differences.
