The Deaf Boy

Many years ago a wonderful friend of mine asked me what the smallest part of the body is. I was very young and probably very stupid at the time and I responded with “Duh a finger.” He commented to me no it’s the tongue. He also said to me that although the tongue is the smallest part of the body it can do the most damage. I never forgot the conversation that I had with him; unfortunately he has since passed away and I miss him dearly. I could sure use a lot more of his advice and teaching. Our words can really do some damage. Damage sometimes that can be life long, and sometimes we don’t even know what were doing, probably because we just were never taught how to shut-up.  Kids and adults can shoot their mouth off and think that they are being funny, or that their standing up for themselves when in reality they may be doing more harm than good. I was watching a baseball game very recently and watched one of the players go crazy over a call third strike. This is a grown man.  He had to be restrained by 3 other players and the manager. Of course he was thrown out of the game. He was also suspended for three games right in the middle of a pennant race. I guess he really showed them. What a dope!

We are constantly challenged by people with statements like “Are you going to take that from him, or you better say something. We also like to have laughs at someone else’s expense. My philosophy is if we both aren’t laughing it’s not funny. Kids today have a real problem with behavior like this. They say things, get a laugh and really hurt the feelings of another person. I don’t even think that they are aware of the fact that people are listening and not everyone is impressed with their wit, and that they are creating a negative image of themselves in the minds of other people.

That wonderful friend of mine who talked to me about the tongue was also full of illustrations and stories that were inspiring and instructional. He illustrated this societal problem with a true story that I always refer to as the “Deaf Boy” story and it is worth sharing here.

There were two boys who were brothers. One of the boys was deaf. They had a friend who hung around with them all the time.  This friend was the biggest jokester on two feet. He was always telling jokes or making fun of someone or something. One day the three boys were headed out of the house and this jokester started to make fun of the way the deaf boy spoke. Well the deaf kid couldn’t hear, and the brother gave a half hearted laugh and they left the house. No harm no foul? The deaf  kid didn’t hear so no one got hurt. No one heard right?  No one heard except the deaf kid’s father who was reading the paper in the den.

Let’s fast forward the tape. At the time of this incident these two boys were sophomores in college. Two years went by and they both graduated with degrees in business administration. They both went on the job hunt. This jokester had an interview with a large insurance company. He had to go through one more phase of the hiring process. He had to meet the Vice-President of the company. Who do you think the Vice-President was? The deaf kid’s father, and the only perception that he had of this young man was that he made fun of his son. It cost him……..the job. People hear and they watch too. You never know when you are going to need someone or something. The things that are the greatest desires of our heart are the things that will be withheld from us because of our past words or actions. Self-control is important and if your tongue, a one ounce body part has more control over you than you have of it, it will cost you when least expect it. You never know.

 

 

Determination/Perseverance

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow once said, “The heights of great men reached and kept were not attained by sudden flight, but they, while their companions slept, were toiling upward through the night.” When I was learning to write cursive, this was one of the quotations that I had to write over and over again, and to this day, it is ingrained in my brain. As I got older I realized how deep and meaningful these words were and I use the quotation as often as I see necessary to encourage and uplift others and myself who may read whatever I write. It encourages me to set goals, strive for the best, persevere and set standards, and finish whatever I have started, and most of all NEVER give up!!

Throughout my life I have had failures – failed exams, failed relationships, failed interviews, failed lesson plans or lessons taught, failed friendships, heartaches, heartbreaks, among others. What have I learned from these disappointments? I have learned things about me that I didn’t know before and I have learned to set the bars higher at times and reach again for my goals. Another lesson learned from my failures is how to be confident.  Failure shows me that I need to fight even when the road seems rocky. My shortcomings are temporary setbacks, but I can move forward. I can use my failures to reach out to others and encourage them and say, “I was there and this is what I did, and look where it got me!”  I got over the hurdles and I’m going to the finish line.

From the ‘failure” experiences, I have learned that, like the Greek philosopher Plutarch said, “What I achieve inwardly will change outer reality. “  I can give of my time to students, co-workers, and others I come in contact with when needed.  Even when I experienced nausea and gut wrenching pain, I am still willing to help and show acts of kindness.

I have realized that I am a survivor and each time I have to dig deeper to float above water. As a non-swimmer who loves water, I know I can sit, relax, meditate and listen to the sound of the water, but not submerge. I know my limits! I know how to persevere and I can help those who need help to persevere! I have been acquainted with failure and I know it is not fun, but I channeled my energy to achieving! I realize that attitude is more important than aptitude and I AM disciplined!